We all face certain moments in our lives where there is a large decision to be made. Do I take this road or that road; do I go left or do I go right? Some of these decisions are small and some will define the rest of our lives. One question I am often asked is, “How did you finally make the decision to get sober?”
Honestly, I don’t think that on the evening of surrender I actually made a solid decision to get sober. For me, it was more about just trying to do something different because my way wasn’t working. I spent most of my life being a know it all and was never one to take advice from anyone. I think on that fateful evening in 2010, I was so beaten down that I finally became willing to start following some directions.
That moment of surrender is beautiful, really. It’s a point of no return where we are finally faced with nothing but ourselves. On the day I got sober, it was the moment that would change my life forever. While my first year felt like I was simply putting one foot in front of the other, each day would seem a little easier. I really began to understand the importance of “one day at a time.” It’s crazy when I sit and think about the fact that I have been two different people. The person I am today is nothing like the person I used to be. Today, I think about how I have hit those points of surrender in sobriety also. We talk about hitting bottom and, to me, hitting bottom is simply when the pain finally outweighs the pleasure and I become willing to do something different. Even in sobriety, it still seems like I have to get beat down a bit to finally get to that point of surrender.
We all get to a place where we have to choose – we have to make a choice that we don’t want to make but have to. While life is beautiful, it can also be chaotic and messy – even when we are doing everything right.
I think that’s what my song “The Truth” is about. I’m still writing and recording, so I hope you’ll take a listen. If you like what you hear on YouTube, you can download the song from iTunes, Apple Music, Spotify, Amazon, etc. https://lnk.to/Blythe
I’m going to start writing more. My soul needs it.
Much love –
Featured image obtained via Hernan Pinara https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0/